Gordisms.....

 

There exists a quantity of artificial butter flavor beyond which people begin to believe it's not butter.

This is known as the margarine of error.

Archeologists are holding a party to celebrate unearthing the largest dinosaur tibia ever...

It's going to be quite the shindig.

Christiano Ronaldo's house is always neat and tidy.

Because he is not messi.

Fred keeps trying to convince me that hemp protein is just as good as milk based protein powders.

But there's no whey.

Fred only goes to the rollerskating rink on Tuesdays from 2 to 4 because it’s half off.

He's a real cheap skate.