crotchety ruv

 

  Fred is trying to lose weight by snorting cocaine. He calls it 'Diet Coke'. The man who first got men and women playing tennis together in groups of four passed away last week. RIP Mick Stubbles. A sign in a sporting goods store: Now is the winter of our discount tents. Mnemonic possessio: When you have an acronym stuck in your head.

 

 

  Fred's theft remains undetected. He stole a board game from his sister, she has no Clue. Fred spent ten minutes on a machine in the gym and then threw up. The machine did have a great range of chocolate and chips, though. Fred joined a gym and they put him on a resistance training program. It's going really well. So far he has resisted training every day this week. Ever wonder about people that paid a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water? Just read the name backwards.

 

 

  On a dark dessert highway I have? Cool whip in my hair. Have you noticed that when a defibrillator fails, nobody is shocked? If you're dating someone who doesn't like Star Wars, you're looking for love in Alderaan places. And if you do find someone who likes Star Wars, you can tell them, "Yoda one for me!" Fred tried a new recipe today: Skirt Steak, Eye of Newt, Pinto Beans, Wool of Bat, Chili Powder, Scale of Dragon... He just LOVES Hex-Mex.