crotchety ruv

 

  Life is like marble: Don't take it for granite. Fred has a knack for admitting his own weaknesses. It's one of his strengths. A slippery slope.. is the path of least resistance. There's been a rash of home burglaries. Police are checking every crook and nanny.

 

  A nurse walks into a bank to deposit her pay check. She reaches into her purse to pull out a pen to sign her check. To her dismay, she pulls out a rectal thermometer. In frustration, she throws her arms up and shouts, "Oh, great! Some asshole has my pen! from doug...

  Happy medium: a psychic who loves their job. Fred called it curtains on his set designer career. He left without making a scene. Everybody laughs when they hear the name Uranus mentioned in the planet line up. However, Saturn has a nicer ring to it. Where do people who like to correct others get their water from? A well, actually.

 

 

  The Spice Girls are making a comeback… Makes scents that it’s being sponsored by Old Spice.   Fred opened up a cheese shop featuring Middle Eastern cheeses. It’s called, “Cheeses of Nazareth.“ This morning I had no trouble rolling out of bed. It did, however, take great effort to get off the floor. I get up at 3 or 4 every night to use the bathroom. That’s why they’re called the wee hours of the morning.