crotchety ruv

 

 

  ONE spelling mistake can ruin your entire marriage. Fred accidentally messaged his wife "I'm having a great time. I wish you were her”. Why doesn't Istanbul have a Royal family? Because they... can't stand a noble. Apparently there’s a new fetish where you inflate farm animals with helium. Well, whatever floats your goat. The last Czar thought that the Russian revolution... ...was just a load of Bolshevik.

 

Being a cellist is awesome. You take a bow before performing and then take a bow after performing. Fred tried to sneak into a Star Trek convention dressed as the doctor but the security guards suspected that he wasn't the real McCoy. Fred got into an altercation with a tailor. Fred's balloon elephant wouldn’t fit in the back seat of the car so he had to pop the trunk.  

 

 

 

  Fred doubted that his chiropractor could help him. But he stands corrected. A gambler in Vegas was poisoned. He was saved when they administered the ante-dote. I read recently that 60 is the new 40, but the traffic police are having none of it. Fred was arrested for stealing underwear. Police say he was on a brief crime spree.