crotchety ruv

 

  Fred crashed his Mini Countryman… He's now re-Cooper-ating. Fred tried making a volcano-themed cake. It was a recipe for disaster, and he blew his top when it failed. Fred knows some people who like to dress up as German philosophers. That's a pretty Nietzsche hobby. What'd the shirt say to the pants? 'Sup, britches?

 

 

  Somebody stole my fluorescent jacket. They can run, but they can't hide. When Fred's wife wanted to add more stuffing to our pillows,  he told her it wasn’t necessary. But she doubled down. Fred took his kids on a trip in a camper van and all they kept asking was.. RV there yet? Fred was gonna tell a railroad joke… But he lost his train of thought.

 

from vince...  

  The makers of ex-lax are looking for a band to promote their product. Fred suggested The Go-Go's. How do they welcome new members at a nudist colony? With a bare hug. Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your containers. I’ve never seen the inside of my ears with my own eyes, but I’ve heard good things.