crotchety ruv

 

 

  A chicken has laid the world's tiniest egg… Farmers say that's gonna be hard to beat. Some chocolate factory workers started a hip-hop group. They called themselves The Candy Bar Rappers. Fred is no expert on masturbation, but he holds his own. Envelopes carry letters but without an address it takes one to no one.

 

 

  Fred had an obsessed girlfriend once, she looked at him and all she saw was diamonds and rubies. Her name was Gemini. People who cannot tell the difference between etymology and entomology…. …bug me in a way I cannot put into words. Shotgun wedding: A wife or death situation. Fred is a bankrupt historian. His business lies in ruins. He tried pivoting to archaeology but his business model was already in a state of decay.

 

 

  Fred is dating an entomologist. But she is really starting to bug him. Fred applied for a job as a mirror installer, but they turned him down. Said he  didn't reflect well on the company.