crotchety ruv

 

  The difference between a device you make calls on and getting hoisted by your own petard? One is a cell phone, the other is a self-own. Fred accidentally put the dishwashing detergent up on the top shelf. It made his wife jump for joy. What kind of pants would a ghost hunter wear? Just a paranormal jeans. Between Fred and his wife, Fred is the only one who gambles on horse races. You could say he is her bettor half.

 

 

  Sausages shouldn’t have a ‘Best By’ date. They should have a ‘Wurst By’ date. There’s been considerable debate about whether you can or can’t hurry love. The case will soon be heard by The Supremes Court. If  you eat too many edibles, you'll get a pot belly. A seamstress quit her job to pursue a career in music. Now she's a Singer/Songwriter.... Or sew it seams.

 

 

  Although it can't be proven, it's widely accepted that Euclid had a storage space at the top of his house. It's considered axiom attic. Fred never thought Phil Collins would get into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame... ...but he did. Against all odds. Fred is a little confused as to why everyone keeps giving him LEGOs for his birthday. He just doesn’t know what to make of it. Fred is writing a textbook about the composition of the bodies of pasture animals. He'll call it Graze Anatomy.