-

 Kim Jung-Un has read every book ever written...

That's why they call him the Supreme Reader.

Tomorrow was voted to be the most popular day to start a diet.

I make noises every time I stand up.
I'm a groan man.

It’s not easy having erectile dysfunction.
It’s not hard, either.

Fred got fired from a clothing store.
He apparently has hanger management issues.


Police chased down a guy who stole a satchel full of documents.
It was actually a brief chase.

Fred asked a polygamist about his marriages.
He said "six women seems like a bit much dozen tit"?

A gentleman is a man that can play bagpipes but chooses not to.

A female relative who watches your kids?
Vigil-aunty.

Color blind people often harbor jealousy towards those with normal vision.
They’re gray with envy.




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Gordisms...

-
  I’m devastated. My nascent singing career has been derailed by a vocal cord injury. It’s hard to say what I’ll do next. Fred has sex daily. His doctor told him it’s completely common to have his letters all jumbled up. THe kind of fish you catch with a bookworm? Read snapper. All of a sudden every tree I see is a pine tree or a fir tree… My psychiatrist says I am experiencing Conifer-mation bias. Some people confuse Ribeyes with T-Bones but it’s nothing serious… It’s just a case of misteaken identity. If you’re ever stranded on a sheet of ice, you won’t be able to steer it. You’ll just have to go with the floe. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be able to order take out telepathically? Now that is food for thought. When the Naval academy admissions committee reviews applicants....... Do they sort them as innies and outies? A prostitute is a member of the fare sex. How do you drown a hipster? Throw him in the mainstream. Sound engineers are not good as co-workers. Th...
Read more