mid week gordies...

Fred slept like a log last night
Woke up in the woodshed.

 

If towels could tell jokes
They'd have a very dry sense of humor.

 

Demons would make good lawyers because possession is nine tenths of the law.

 

Fred got a new job at the observatory…
Everything’s looking up.

 

I decided I need less negatively in my life...
...so from now on I'll only measure temperatures in degrees Kelvin.

 

Fred does have schizophrenia, but he’s good people.

 

Fred is going to open a  sperm bank in Indiana called Hoosier Daddy.

 

It's hard to get a straight answer from a champion wrestler.

They're hard to pin down.