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 Fred spent $300 to hire a limousine and discovered that the fee did not include a driver.

He can't believe spending all that money and having nothing to chauffeur it.


A sleepwalking nun is a roamin' catholic.

People who want liposuction be warned, there is a big weight list.

If you're having second thoughts you're two up on most people.

The muscle behind  Fred's shin atrophied.
Turns out he was drinking too much decalf.


The city of  Portland is good at keeping things neat and tidy.
They know how to Oregonize things.

Sherpas were shocked to discover a man sleeping on Mount Everest.
They found Himalayan there.

Bill Nye broke up with his boyfriend.
No more Mr. Nye’s guy.

Fred is obsessed with enunciating and speaking clearly at all times.
He has a diction addiction.

Vietnamese and Indian restaurant owners are different.
One is Pho profit, the other is Naan profit.



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