Gordisms...

 

Fred keeps twitching his head and shouting out BROCCOLI and CAULIFLOWER.
He's been diagnosed with Florets.

 

I’m obsessed with sketching pictures of fruit and I really need to stop.
I’ve got to draw the Lime somewhere.

 

Fred programmed a pirate game, but users said the main character doesn't look like a pirate.
There will be a patch soon.

 

What do you call it when the quantity of horses matches the quantity of hay?
Stable equilibrium.

 

A guitar player's favorite Italian food?
Strum-boli.

 

Heavy cream is good, but it could be butter.

What do you call an extra meal after dinner?
Supperfluous.

 

Fred glued himself to his driver’s manual.
He decided to adhere to the rules.

 

Fred was pretty weird about the whole Halloween experience.
I attribute that to his mummy issues.

 

I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today.
It was clogged.

 

I have to improve my golf skills.
They aren’t on par with everyone else’s.

 

If you're buying a guitar, watch out for deals that seem too good to be true.
You'll find there's too many strings attached.