Gordisms...

 

For their first date, Fred took his girlfriend to an ice rink where entry was half price.

She called him a cheap skate.

I recently saw an advertisement for a double entendre contest.

So I entered my friend.

Fred got fired on the first day of his new job for asking customers if they would prefer "Smoking or Non-Smoking."

Apparently, the correct phrase is, "Cremation or Burial."

In the 1600s, Rene Descartes was conceptualizing a video conferencing program.

Cogito, ergo Zoom.

Fred's dog was rushed to the vet after swallowing a tennis ball.

The vet said he’ll bounce back.

My spiritual guide makes cheese as a hobby.

I'm hoping he'll show me the whey.

Fred can transform into a bowl of minestrone.

He’s soup or human.

A Japanese chef was arrested for financial crimes.

He was involved in a ponzu scheme.

Don’t troll fishermen.

They’ll take their anchor out on you.

Fred says the only way to really sharpen a pencil is to do it with a knife by hand.

I want to tell him he’s wrong, but he makes a good point.

Fred's psychologist side-hustles in real estate.

He left Fred with an apartment complex.

Fred is obsessed with buckets.

Anything else pails in comparison.

For their first date, Fred took his girlfriend to an ice rink where entry was half price.
She called him a cheap skate.

I recently saw an advertisement for a double entendre contest.
So I entered my friend.

Fred got fired on the first day of his new job for asking customers if they would prefer "Smoking or Non-Smoking."
Apparently, the correct phrase is, "Cremation or Burial."

In the 1600s, Rene Descartes was conceptualizing a video conferencing program.
Cogito, ergo Zoom.

Fred's dog was rushed to the vet after swallowing a tennis ball.
The vet said he’ll bounce back.

My spiritual guide makes cheese as a hobby.
I'm hoping he'll show me the whey.

For their first date, Fred took his girlfriend to an ice rink where entry was half price.

She called him a cheap skate.

I recently saw an advertisement for a double entendre contest.

So I entered my friend.

Fred got fired on the first day of his new job for asking customers if they would prefer "Smoking or Non-Smoking."

Apparently, the correct phrase is, "Cremation or Burial."

In the 1600s, Rene Descartes was conceptualizing a video conferencing program.

Cogito, ergo Zoom.

Fred's dog was rushed to the vet after swallowing a tennis ball.

The vet said he’ll bounce back.

My spiritual guide makes cheese as a hobby.

I'm hoping he'll show me the whey.