crotchety ruv

 

  Fred is changing chiropractors. He hopes it’s not too big an adjustment. I don't want a mausoleum after I die... It's tomb much. Fred bought a carpet that glows in the dark. It's floorescent. Fred insists that he isn't overweight. He says he has just upgraded to family size.

 

 

  Fred is deaf and since he fractured his arm, he only speaks in broken English. Fred started dating a mime. They're not talking yet, but things are going great. When you're traveling in France, you shouldn't eat finger foods with your left hand. It's considered gauche. Someone asked me how I found out about REO Speedwagon. I heard it from a friend who heard it from a friend.

 

 

  Fred found some cigarettes at the thrift shop. They were second hand smokes. Fred always does the limbo when going on first dates. It lowers the bar. Fred was feeling down yesterday and asked his wife "Am i useless?" She said "No honey, you are not useless, you can be used as a bad example." Tennis players are the most humble people. No matter how rich they get, they still serve others."